When I look back on my life, it’s not that I don’t want to see things exactly as they happened, it’s just that I prefer to remember them in an artistic way. And truthfully, the lie of it all is much more honest because I invented it.
Clinical psychology tells us arguably that trauma is the ultimate killer. Memories are not recycled like atoms and particles in quantum physics; they can be lost forever. It’s sort of like my past is an unfinished painting and as the artist of that painting, I must fill in all the ugly holes and make it beautiful again.
It’s not that I’ve been dishonest, it’s just that I loathe reality.
For example, those nurses – they’re wearing next season Calvin Klein, and so am I. And the shoes – custom Giuseppe Zanotti. I tipped their gauze caps to the side like Parisian berets because I think it’s romantic, and I also believe that mint will be very big in fashion next Spring.
Check out this nurse on the right, she’s got a great ass. Bam.
The truth is, back then at the clinic, they only wore those funny hats to keep the blood out of their hair. And that girl on the left – she ordered gummy bears and a knife a couple of hours ago. They only gave her the gummy bears.
I’d wished they’d only given me the gummy bears.
hen I first saw Gaga’s tweet about an early release of a “prelude” of the prelude of ‘Marry The Night’ music video, I was a little put off. I had actually thought that it would be better if she were to simply put out the entire video in its entity to let us enjoy it as a whole. I’m sure even the most hardcore fans can wait a few days, or even weeks, for the full music video experience.
Maybe I don’t really trust the directing of Haus of Gaga after their first (poor) attempt in ‘The Edge of Glory’ music video. Or it could be Gaga’s tweet that seemed to me like a desperate attempt to hype up the media.
Seriously?! Is there really a need to mention how many frames there are?
But after watching the video, my reaction was…….
OMGWTFBBQ. I WAS SO WRONG.
The pre-prelude is so refreshing! It’s very cinematic (steadycam + long take) and seemingly a gripping story hinted by lines that are synonymous with the story of her career and her interviews verbatim. Rather intense for a minute, 47 seconds AND 18 FRAMES (LOL) prelude.
I mean, how could I have doubted our QUEEN, right? Gaga will never do the same thing twice and each attempt will only be a one-up of the last. I enjoyed the voiceover (is it me or does she sound a bit different from the way she usually speaks?) so much that I decided to post up the transcript of the video, and hence, this blog post. Oh, and the humor in the lines is nicely written imho!
Now it just gets exciting from here! CANNOT WAIT FOR THE FULL VIDEO!!!
Haven’t been updating here for a bit, just posting this up in memory of the great man.
This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.
I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That’s it. No big deal. Just three stories.
The first story is about connecting the dots.
I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?
It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: “We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?” They said: “Of course.” My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.
And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents’ savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn’t see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn’t interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.
It wasn’t all romantic. I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:
Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn’t have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can’t capture, and I found it fascinating.
None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.
Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
My second story is about love and loss.
I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.
I really didn’t know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down – that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.
I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.
During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple’s current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.
I’m pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.
My third story is about death.
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.
I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I’m fine now.
This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960′s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.
Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.
UPDATE!!! I think Gaga figured that her video was leaking so she tweeted “FUCK” “THURS” and “DAY” to fulfill her promise of releasing the video at her 1000th tweet. Good news for the little monsters as the video came one day earlier!
Mother monster was in town last week and I got the chance to attend both the media conference and the showcase thanks to DK & Singtel AMPed!
Not gonna write a lot, just here to spam the photos taken during the media conf in the afternoon!
Visit my Flickr for more of the teal hair awesomeness!
Didn’t take any photos during the showcase cos I wanna truly enjoy the performance! But here’s a recording I found on YouTube of, imho, the best part of the performance that night:
hen I first received an email about some new local boy band, I thought it was yet another “media release” email, so I didn’t really read it through. This morning I received yet another email from them, asking me if I had watched their video or not. So I was thinking, “WAH THEY DAMN BUAY PAI SEH HOR? Keep asking me to watch their video? This better be good.”
And I opened the link to this:
I had a really good laugh. But IMHO, it’s also a bit insulting; Why the manly guys seem to behave like gu niangs whenever they have their blonde wig on? I bleach my hair ergo I am gu niang?
But oh well, let’s not be too sensitive and it doesn’t hurt look on the brighter side, right?
After all, they did say my hair rocks, and their girlfriends prefers me…
…even though the girlfriend looks like crap.
But seriously, your wigs are damn ugly.
You guys look better like this:
Anyway, the blog entry that they are referring to is this one which I wrote about bleaching my hair.
Not really sure this whole “boy band” thing is legit or not, but I’m quite sure it’s a creative marketing campaign by Paypal. Pretty innovative I must say, a very smart way to get people blogging about it when you don’t even need to ask them to.
There’s a whole bunch of other videos dedicated to other people and, if I’m not wrong, it’ll be out on wepromiseyou.com later at 4pm! Can’t wait to see the other videos!
hen I first saw Gaga’s tweet about an early release of a “prelude” of the prelude of ‘Marry The Night’ music video, I was a little put off. I had actually thought that it would be better if she were to simply put out the entire video in its entity to let us enjoy it as a whole. I’m sure even the most hardcore fans can wait a few days, or even weeks, for the full music video experience.
hen I first received an email about some new local boy band, I thought it was yet another “media release” email, so I didn’t really read it through. This morning I received yet another email from them, asking me if I had watched their video or not. So I was thinking, “WAH THEY DAMN BUAY PAI SEH HOR? Keep asking me to watch their video? This better be good.”
